Dear readunderwear.com

Dear readunderwear,

Recently I have been waking up with little or no motivation. My doctor has offered to write prescriptions for Zoloft, Prozac, Ritalin and Sertralin.

I hesitate to start medicating my condition as I feel it is just temporary.

I was recently referred to you by my brother Rod (His name isn’t really Rod, I want to protect his anonymity). Rod told me that he has experienced an increase in energy since he started wearing your underwear. He told me he has even started bowling again. Rod hasn’t bowled in years!
He explained to me that he wakes up every day excited to see what’s in his underwear drawer. Rod now has over 100 pairs of your underwear.

My question is does your underwear work for everybody?

Yours Truly,

Lethargic

Dear Lethargic,

I do not know if our underwear works for everybody. I’m glad to hear your brother is bowling again. Readunderwear has been known to increase one’s zest for life. It is a catalyst of inspiration for many readunderwearers. I recommend you buy a pair and see if they work for you!

Good Luck,

The readunderwear team

Red Rhymes with Read

Red, a color of passion...
An everlasting kiss.

A color of warmth...
Sunset, sunrise.

A color that stands out from the crowd...
A daring Dress.

A pair of boots that makes a statement...
"I kick ass"

Strawberries, cherries, raspberries. Apples, tomatoes, peppers. Fruits and vegetables alike, this color brings a certain ambiance to every meal.

A color of love...
A single red rose has made many a woman swoon.

Red comes in numbers...
#DF010, #8A0808, #FF0000, #FE2E2E, the numbers go on and on.

Red is a color of stature...
A Barn, in a lonely field.

Red has a literary twin...
Especially when I put on my boxers.

readunderwear trumps newspaper industry

People don't read the paper anymore. That's right, in recent polls more people are now reading panties, boxers, undershirts camisoles etc.
The recent rise in underwear reading is due to the marketing genius of readunderwear.com.

When we interviewed Maurika Wells CEO, she was quoted as saying "We knew we were on to something when the New York Times offered to buy us."

Although readunderwear is less than a month old, they have shifted a paradigm that has been in existence since the very first daily post.
The stoic paper boy image from the 1950's is evolving... Now these icons of the newspaper industry deliver underwear.

Mary Smith from Pigsknuckle, Arkansas said "Jimmy has thrown papers on our front steps for the last 3 years. Last week, Jimmy started delivering undergarments. Not only can I read em, I can wear em! I love readunderwear!"
Donald Smith from Boston thought there was some kind of a mix-up "When my paper boy delivered a pair of Brave Panties, I thought he'd made a mistake, but once I started reading I couldn't put them down. They made me feel good and ready to start my day. Every morning I'm excited to read my daily underwear, so I'm ready to tackle the world!"

Well, for whatever reason, the public loves readunderwear...

For more information about readunderwear visit their website at www.readunderwear.com or email them at info@readunderwear.com.

Teddy Bears and Underwears...

This was in my inbox this morning...

thought I'd share...

I like to snuggle with my teddy bears
But snuggling is so much better
In my underwears.
Streaking in panties is fun
In the snow or in the sun
Eating my macaronies
Is funner in my chonies
I’d sing a little song
In a lowrise or a thong
My grandma bought me flowerful nighties
And I traded them for tighty whities
I stopped three pickpockets and four thieves
It’s all due to my sexy fine pink briefs!

OBAMA should wear my underwear...

seriously.

i mean - well... not MY underwear, but the underwear that i make.
you know - readunderwear, underwear.
you know RIGHT!

why?

because he would look so fine in the quote - "be the change you wish to see in the world" - and the quote would suit him just SO much more than fine.

who else could wear readunderwear underwear???

would you, could you, read my underwear?

So how would you get someone to read your underwear?

A simple question?
Nice to meet you... have you read my underwear?

Trading or Bribery?
I'll give you a spork and a pair of Nike Air Jordan's if you read my underwear...

Streaking?
Did you get a chance to read that guy's... underwear?

Bargaining?
I'll read your underwear, if you read my underwear...

Cajoling?
c'mon... read my underwear...

Jokes?
What are you readin' under there?

Car Sales?
What's it gonna take to get you to read my underwear?

Panhandling?
Will read underwear for food...

Motivational?
Never, never, never, never give up... on reading underwear.

Fortune Cookie?
You will inherit the earth after you read my underwear.

Email Forward?
read these underwear and forward the message to 10 of your friends. If you do so within 24 hours, you will receive a self-propelled lawn mower, a set of ginsu knives, a vespa for two, a free subscription to field & stream, a fruit basket, a george bush chia pet, a my little pony lunch pale, a toaster oven, a family of 4 pink flamingo lawn ornaments, 2 round trip tickets to bismarck north dakota, a 3 night stay at the quintessential super 8 and a free meal at the acme bowling alley...
If you do NOT, you will stub your toe in the middle of the night, weekly for the rest of your life...

what the heck?

why are there only 4 packs of carrots in a lunch pack when there are 5 days in a week?

is oil biotic?

why do people say irregardless?

why do we pay to watch OTHER people play?

why do eskimo's have so many words for snow?

if eating animals is bad, why do they call it meat?

what's a liger?

who is it exactly, peeling the mandarin oranges?

if you aren't supposed to hitch-hike, why do we have such big thumbs?

why would anyone close a rest stop on the freeway...

why are all our superheros make-believe?

what's with the number 13, and can it get a job easier than number 12?

why isn't it acceptable for men to wear thongs?

why did they kill optimus prime?

why is 3 the magic number?

does mister rodgers really have tattoos on his arms?

why are they growing grass on the other side?

will canada be north montana someday?

coffee or tea?